On a Tightrope? Learn How To Balance Life And Work
Work-life balance – what the bloody hell does that actually mean? Let’s talk about it in simpler terms. I’ve always struggled with this idea because life isn’t as straightforward as balancing two things on a scale. In reality, our lives are not a straight line, even without considering work. Life is more complex than just finding an equilibrium between two things. Let’s break it down and figure out what it means for each of us. Balancing Act When we say work-life balance, some think it means having a perfect schedule – starting and stopping at specific times, creating a clear boundary before enjoying personal life afterwards. But in reality, life throws unexpected stuff at us. It’s more like a tricky dance than a perfect scale. Dealing with work-life balance is finding what works best for you. While it may mean that you don’t have exact start and stop times for your tasks, it means that you feel comfortable in your routine without compromising your well-being. Setting Priorities Sometimes, you end up doing more at work than planned, and then you have to go back to the important things you initially set out to do. Instead of stressing about perfect balance, let’s figure out what’s really important. Identify what matters most at work and in your personal life and know what should come first. Setting some things at work aside to deal with your personal life and vice versa doesn’t mean you’ve lost balance—you just identified what’s most important. No one ever, on their deathbed ever said “I wish I’d stayed at work longer rather than spending the time with friends or family.” Forget Multitasking Doing many things at once may seem cool, but research shows it’s not as great as we think. Being fully present in one thing at a time is way better. It’s like giving your full attention to a work task when you’re working and doing the same at home. By focusing on one thing at a time, we avoid not only making errors but we can also get things done more efficiently. Tools for Getting Back on Track We all need tools to help us stay balanced. The LeadingME® idea helps us take charge and return to a balanced state when things feel out of control. Recognising when we’re leaning too much one way allows us to use tools like meditation or LeadingME® tools. Understanding the Ego We don’t have a choice but to work with ego and we need our ego. Think of the ego as either mastering you or you mastering the ego. By understanding and guiding our ego, we can avoid extremes of ‘Bigging’ ourselves, others or things or ‘Belittling’ ourselves, others or things, and instead find a middle ground of LeadingME® that feels good. Try and take a look at your own situation from a different perspective because this allows you to guide your ego to that middle ground. Make Balance Your Own Work-life balance isn’t the same for everyone. Instead of fitting into someone else’s idea, figure out what works for you. Talk to the people around you about your needs and priorities and also theirs. This way, everyone understands and supports each other. Wrap-Up As we take a moment to think, let’s simplify work-life balance. Instead of chasing a perfect balance, let’s focus on what makes sense and works best for us and those around us. Being present, setting priorities, setting boundaries, and using simple tools to help us create a balanced and meaningful life. LeadingME® with intention makes the journey more enjoyable and true to who we are. Find the middle ground that works well for you and helps you stay on your path without going astray. Stay True, Stay You, and Keep Bringing Out Your Brilliance!
How to Handle Difficult Conversations
Today, let’s delve into the crucial topics of conflict resolution and handling difficult conversations. While they may seem like separate issues, I believe they share a common approach. Our objective is to transform what might feel like a battleground into a constructive dialogue. When we hear the word “conflict,” it often conjures images of chaos and strife, thanks in part to media portrayal. However, I see it as an opportunity to understand the perspectives of all parties involved and find a way forward. Conflict resolution is about exploring both sides and seeking a collaborative solution. It’s all about Perspectives Imagine you’re in a situation with someone, and you both have different viewpoints. It’s like standing in front of the number six. From your angle, it appears as a six. However, someone standing on the opposite side of the number may see it as a nine. Both perspectives are valid, and both are inherently right. This simple illustration highlights a fundamental truth in conflict resolution and communication: people often perceive the same situation differently based on their viewpoints, experiences and beliefs. The issue often arises from our tendency to perceive one side as right and the other as wrong. This is where we go wrong – we need to consider how each person is looking at the situation and what they see, hear and feel. To address such conflicts effectively, it’s crucial to understand, try to view and respect all perspectives involved. Handling difficult conversations can feel challenging because we are consumed by thoughts like, “What if I say the wrong thing?” or “Will they react negatively?” in LeadingME® Ladder of Leadership terms ‘Belittling’. Then there is the other side of the LeadingME® Ladder of Leadership ‘Bigging’ where we are consumed with thoughts of “What do they think they are doing?… not on my watch they don’t.” or “I’m going to sort them out once and for all.” The key is to approach them prepared, skillfully and balanced. (If you want to know where you are on the LeadingME® Ladder of Leadership, then click this link to hear all about it from Mags Live). Here are some tips on how to handle difficult conversations: Preparation Is Key Effective conflict resolution and issue management requires careful preparation and a fact-based approach. People often jump to conclusions based on hearsay or gossip, which can lead to unnecessary conflicts. Instead, it’s crucial to encourage individuals to provide concrete evidence and stand by their claims if they bring forward concerns. This ensures that decisions are made based on factual information and not unverified rumours. Furthermore, it’s important to be prepared for unforeseen personal matters that may arise during discussions. In these situations, maintaining a supportive and non-judgemental stance is essential. When addressing issues, take on the role of an investigative professional, gathering all relevant evidence and listening to all sides of the story. Create a safe space for them to share their perspective without judgement. It also includes any of your own firsthand experiences of the situation. You have the specifics logged. This approach helps you make informed decisions and handle conflicts with objectivity and professionalism. Craft an Effective Opening Statement The next important step is to begin the conversation with a clear and open statement. Being upfront and transparent about the issue is crucial; don’t try to hide or dance around it. When you approach someone with uncertainty or vague language like, “I’ve heard some things,” it can make the other person anxious and defensive. To prepare for this, craft an opening statement that sets the stage for a constructive conversation. You might say something like, “I’ve learned that there have been discussions about x, y, and z, and I’m here to listen to your perspective. I haven’t made any judgements; I simply want to understand your point of view.” If you’ve done your preparation and feel confident, avoid jumping to conclusions or worrying about potential reactions. Staying neutral and clear in your statement can make the discussion smoother and more productive, ensuring that both parties understand what the conversation is about. Listen, Listen, Listen The key point to remember is the importance of active listening. As the saying goes, “We have two ears and one mouth for a reason,” which means we should listen more than we speak. After your clear opening statement, it’s essential to shift the focus from talking to listening. You do this by preparing a really good open question. This is the moment to put a mental “zipper” on your mouth and engage your ears. This means not just hearing words but trying to understand the emotions and thoughts behind them. This involves staying focused during the conversation, understanding their message and showing that you value their viewpoint. If you find it necessary, you can let the other person know that you’ll be taking notes to help you remember important points and ensure you grasp their perspective. Then, make a conscious effort to truly hear what they’re saying and show them you are committed to understanding their perspective. This active listening approach will help facilitate a meaningful and productive conversation. Recap and Clarify Summarising back to them, what you thought you’d heard after the other person has finished speaking is a crucial aspect of effective communication. It’s important because sometimes, just like the number six and nine scenarios, we may interpret things our way. We tend to hear what we expect or want to hear rather than exactly what someone else is saying or meaning. This principle aligns with Stephen Covey’s insights in his book, “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.” His fifth habit encourages us to prioritise understanding others before seeking to be understood. It’s all about actively listening and comprehending before jumping to conclusions. By embracing this practice, you demonstrate your commitment to genuinely understanding the other person’s perspective before attempting to convey your own. Collaborative Problem-Solving When it’s your turn to speak, it’s essential to do so with an open mind. The aim is to
6 Top Tips To Being A Great Leader
What makes a great leader? When we pose this question to different individuals, we often receive varied responses, making it challenging to establish a clear and universally accepted definition of leadership excellence. As a result, many people find it perplexing to determine how they can become exceptional leaders or even evaluate their leadership abilities. Let’s discuss the attributes of a great leader. I have six key points to share with you regarding exceptional leadership, drawing from my personal journey of evolving from a manager who merely directed tasks to a leader who inspires and empowers. These insights have been honed through years of experience in management roles and collaboration with high-ranking executives, as success at the top of the organisational hierarchy can significantly impact the entire workforce, promoting a more harmonious and efficient workplace structure. LeadingME®: The Foundation of Great Leadership One key concept we will explore is LeadingME®, a program I have developed based on my extensive interactions with diverse individuals over the years. LeadingME® focuses on self-awareness and understanding, as I’ve come to realise that leadership fundamentally involves guiding individuals who choose to follow. Organisational cultures are shaped by leaders who set an example, but this influence extends beyond just the top-tier executives; it includes influential figures throughout the company. The critical aspect is whether these leaders are exemplifying the right behaviours, aligning their words with their actions, or falling into the trap of greed and unbalanced ego, which has led to the downfall of many prominent businesses. LeadingME® revolves around achieving a balanced ego, rather than dismissing ego entirely. Recognising that ego is a natural part of being human, the key is to strive for balance. This balanced ego provides clarity about what is necessary to benefit the company, its people, and oneself. Leaders should prioritise self-improvement, but not at the expense of the organisation or its employees; it’s about striking the right balance. To lead effectively, whether personally or within a business context, one must embark on a journey of self-discovery. This is where LeadingME® takes its root, emphasising the need for self-awareness. Leaders must intimately understand themselves—clarifying their vision, purpose, and values. These values transcend the generic ideals often associated with leadership, delving into deeply personal beliefs that influence their actions and decisions. Living in alignment with these values is critical, as straying from them can lead to dissatisfaction, stagnation and mental health issues. Ultimately, LeadingME® empowers individuals to recognise when their current path is not serving their best interests and offers the insight and courage to initiate change within themselves, rather than seeking external blame. In essence, it’s about knowing oneself profoundly and using that knowledge to lead authentically, thus creating a positive impact on the organisation and its people. Here are the Six Keys to Great Leadership. Top Tip #1 Knowing Yourself Understanding oneself is absolutely essential. Without a clear understanding of who I am, it’s challenging to find any real purpose or direction in life. When I have a strong grasp of my own identity, desires, and needs, it becomes evident whether the company I’m associated with aligns seamlessly with my values, vision, and purpose. When I genuinely comprehend and connect with the company’s values, vision, and purpose, everything falls into place. I wholeheartedly embrace their mission and feel a deep sense of alignment. This synergy enables me to excel within the organisation, and when I bring new people on board, they too find themselves naturally contributing to the organisation’s success. It’s because we all share common values, purpose, and vision, or at the very least, we find points of convergence within these areas. Before anything else, I must truly know myself. Top Tip #2 Understanding Your People In leadership, it’s vital to comprehend your team members deeply. Many believe money is the primary motivator, but it’s more complex than that. To illustrate, I’d challenge candidates during interviews: “Imagine your worst manager, and you wanted to leave your job desperately. Now, I offer you increasing amounts of money to stay—£50,000, £100,000, £200,000, half a million, even a million. Would you accept?” they all still declined because money alone didn’t suffice. The real motivation lies in what money can offer. As a leader, I realised I must understand what motivates each team member personally. Is it family, travel, hobbies, or something else? This motivation is tied to their values and happiness. To achieve this understanding, I engaged in genuine conversations, showing authentic interest in their beliefs and priorities. It’s not about superficial interest but about building empathy and truly grasping each team member’s individuality. Top Tip #3 Embracing Company Vision, Values, and Purpose The third important thing to consider is aligning with the company’s vision, values, and purpose. You must make sure that these align with your own goals and those of your team. To do this, you should involve your team in creating a vision not only for the company but also for your specific team. Ask questions like: What do we want to achieve in 10 years, 5 years, 3 years, or even just 1 year from now? This helps us set clear goals and work toward them. Everything we do and discuss should revolve around whether it fits our values, vision, and purpose. Many companies have a mission statement, but it’s essential to create one specifically for your team. This ensures that everyone is on the same page and rowing in the same direction. It’s crucial to share this with both existing and new team members so that everyone knows where we’re headed and can contribute effectively. If you haven’t done this yet, it’s something to prioritise. Top Tip #4 Clarity of Direction Once you possess a deep understanding of your goals, your team, and the company’s vision, you can transmit this clarity to your team members. This is not a matter of simply standing aside and hoping for the best, allowing your team to stumble and learn from their mistakes. Yes, there is value in allowing people to make
Workplace Culture and Productivity
In the modern professional landscape, the term “toxic workplace” has become more than a buzzword—it’s a reality that countless individuals face daily. The effects of negativity, unaddressed issues, and a misplaced focus can undermine the very essence of a harmonious and productive work environment. In this blog, we will dissect what defines a toxic workplace, unravel the consequences of a misguided focus, and chart a course toward effective communication and resolution. What is a toxic workplace? What does that actually mean? The term “toxic workplace” often floats around conversations, a label attached to environments we’re cautioned against or the ones we find ourselves struggling within. But what exactly constitutes a toxic workplace? There are three key facets to that. Negative behaviours that either go ignored or rewarded You’re dealing with a situation where negative behaviour is occurring, and people are behaving in ways that create obstacles for others. They might believe their actions benefit them, yet these actions have either been positively reinforced or completely overlooked. Over time, this can contribute to the development of a bullying environment, as there’s no correction of behaviour, thus leading to the emergence of fear. Consequently, this fear starts to take root. A significant aspect to consider is that individuals may not even realise they’re engaging in bullying behaviour, nor do they grasp the negativity it inflicts upon others. This lack of awareness stems from the fact that these behaviours go unaddressed. Often, people don’t recognise that these learned behaviours have been acquired over time through interactions with family, friends, and colleagues. This brings us to a crucial LeadingME® point: If one remains unaware of their actions, how can they initiate change? When such behaviours are disregarded or even rewarded, the cycle repeats itself, ensuring the continuation of the same unfavourable outcomes. This underscores the importance of addressing these matters from the outset. Harassment is played down or it’s ignored Picture this: someone attempts to make a joke, but, it falls short of being humorous. Despite their belief in its comedic value, others don’t share the sentiment. Regrettably, no one steps up to address the situation; instead, it gets swept under the rug. Herein lies a critical question: How can we expect a shift in behaviour if those responsible remain unaware of their impact? Some might argue that these individuals are indeed aware of what they’re doing, but that mostly comes from a place of scepticism. We so easily mistake incompetence for malice when the reality is, most of these people are just completely oblivious to their actions and how it affects others. They live in their own world. While it may apply in some cases, it’s not a universal truth. Regardless, it is imperative that the individual responsible for such behaviour is made aware that their actions are inappropriate, and are alerted to potential consequences. The consequences of allowing harassment and negative discourse to persist are far-reaching. They contribute to an erosion of trust within the team, the management, and the company as a whole. This breakdown in trust sets in motion a chain reaction. Inevitably, fear takes root, further undermining trust. This environment then becomes fertile ground for decreased productivity. Employee engagement in work goes down, and without intervention, toxicity increases. Gossip and rumours In an environment characterised by rampant gossip and circulating rumours, it’s astonishingly easy to become entangled in these discussions. People often find themselves delving into personal opinions about others, engaging in conversations and making up stories about various individuals. When there’s a kindred spirit who is equally willing to contribute to such discussions, it only fuels the fire of negativity. This tendency to dwell on negativity affects our outlook and affects various aspects of our lives, behaving much like a contagious disease that spreads relentlessly. The presence of gossip and rumours contributes to the build-up of powerful emotions such as resentment, anger, mistrust, and fear, all of which feed on and reinforce one another. As a result, we find ourselves facing a complex web of negativity. The cycle begins with negative behaviours that may ultimately pave the way for a bullying culture, particularly when these actions remain unaddressed and uncorrected. Furthermore, the act of gossiping also plays a role, alongside the previously mentioned harassment and bullying, in fostering an environment riddled with negative dynamics. These three elements converge to form a climate of fear, a deterioration of trust, and a breeding ground for resentment and anger. Now, ask yourself, is this truly the kind of atmosphere you envision for your workplace? Probably not. So, if that’s the case— and I sincerely hope it is— what steps can we take to address this situation? This is where the notion of shifting focus comes into play, differentiating between wrong focus and change of focus. Wrong Focus The wrong focus entails succumbing to the negative aspects— engaging in discussions that involve speaking ill of others, and degrading someone else so you can feel better about yourself for all of two seconds. However, transforming this focus necessitates a departure from the vicious cycle of negativity. Instead of getting caught in the trap of criticising and complaining, which ironically aligns with the very behaviours you claim to despise, the key lies in shifting the focus towards a more constructive direction. Often, this transition is fueled by a sense of frustration stemming from the fact that nothing is changing. Well, nothing is going to change if you keep focusing on all that negativity. So, how can we begin the cycle of change, particularly within an environment that might appear deeply entrenched in negativity? It’s important to understand that relying solely on positive thinking won’t suffice. You can’t just go to work thinking positively, expecting that’s going to fix everything; genuine positivity necessitates an emotional shift. To achieve this, there are a couple of things I can suggest. For employees in this situation, I’d recommend a direct conversation with the individual responsible for the issues at hand. Rather than seeking validation or discussing the
We are What We Eat? Bollocks; We Are What We Consume!
How many times have we heard the phrase “we are what we eat.” In this LeadingME™ Wee Gems video, Mags says “Bollocks” to that. She goes on to explain we are what we consume! If you are curious about what this is all about, join us to go into the fakery of the phrases we are given and then start believing, without really thinking! Your *FREE Webinar* to help you Silencing Your Inner Critic – we all have one! http://bit.ly/SilencingYourInnerCriticWebinar1 The Book referred to in this podcast is The Fast 800 by Dr Michael Mosley here’s the website
Poll Results Workplace Culture and Productivity
Thank you for participating in our recent poll about Workplace Culture and Productivity. Your insights are truly invaluable, and the results are well and truly in! We’ve put together a video to give you a dynamic overview of what we’ve uncovered! #magsbell #leadingME® #WorkplaceCultureInsights #PollResults #PollParticipation #ValuableFeedback #IlluminatingResults #UnveilingInsights
No Time To Reflect… how to take off the busy badge
Do you go around saying “I’m busy” or “I’m too busy?” Then you really need to stop, watch this video and reflect. In this Wee Gems, Mags discusses why it’s so important to reflect and how to do that. Especially NOW! If you want to know more about Mags 10 Day Silent Meditation (Vipassana) then jump on her blog here: https://magsbell.com/ Enjoy your *FREE Webinar* to help you Silencing Your Inner Critic – we all have one! http://bit.ly/SilencingYourInnerCriticWebinar1
Failure The Greatest Gift
We fear failing in many things and worry to the point of avoiding. However, if we view it in a different way we can see the greatest gift is in the failure…. or do we call it something else? When we think of failure, for most people it feels heavy and negative and yet when we look back in life at what those moments have either lead to or could have lead to we notice something brilliant about our Failures. Join me Mags Bell in finding the gifts! Enjoy your *FREE Webinar* to help you Silence Your Inner Critic… we all have one! http://bit.ly/SilencingYourInnerCriticWebinar1 Also Checkout https://magsbell.com/ for some more information and help.
Who Triggers You?
We all have people or things in our lives that trigger us into negative thoughts or actions/behaviour. Who or what are your triggers? What are the triggers in your life all about and how can we stop 🚫 reacting to those triggers? Find out what’s behind those triggers and button pushers and what we can do about them! As a thank you enjoy your *FREE Webinar* to help you in Silencing Your Inner Critic – we all have one! http://bit.ly/SilencingYourInnerCriticWebinar1 Also Checkout https://magsbell.com/ for some more information and help.
LOVE… What Is It?
What Is Love Anyway? We hear the words in songs, films, we hear others use the word and we may even use it ourselves but what’s is it? Let’s explore and delve into what love is all about! *FREE Webinar* to help you Silencing Your Inner Critic – we all have one! http://bit.ly/SilencingYourInnerCriticWebinar1 Also Checkout https://magsbell.com/for some more information and help.