Over the years, I’ve found myself overwhelmed more times than I care to admit. Every single time, it happened when I put myself last—when I ignored my values, thinking I was doing what was right for others.
It creeps in, subtly, until our ego takes over and pushes us further down the spiral.
But what if the key to overcoming overwhelm lies in learning to lead ourselves first?
The Day I Realised I Was My Own Problem
The American author and podcaster Cheryl Strayed reminds us: “You don’t have a right to the cards you believe you should have been dealt. You have an obligation to play the hell out of the ones that you’re holding.”
I learned this the hard way. I tried to be Superwoman, managing work, home, and let overwhelm take over.
My advice is – Own your own overwhelm.
I remember planning my birthday party, and even though Paul, my partner, offered to handle everything, my inner control freak couldn’t resist meddling. Even on the morning of the party, I insisted on cutting the grass.
It was ridiculous. It wasn’t until I saw how well Paul had organised everything that I realised: I created my own overwhelm.
Owning your overwhelm means owning that you caused it.
What Happens When Overwhelm Takes Over Your Body?
Overwhelm can reach a point where it affects us physically, emotionally, and mentally and eventually leads to burnout. I share this not as a badge of honour but as a warning: Don’t let it consume you.
When overwhelm hits, it doesn’t just affect our productivity — it clouds our mind with brain fog, drags our emotions all over the place, and can even affect our health. That’s why it’s called dis-ease.
Glennon Doyle wisely says, “You can’t save your face and your ass at the same time. Let yourself fall apart.”
It’s okay to fall apart. Give yourself the space to recharge, take care of your mental and emotional health, and let your body heal. You can’t pour from an empty cup.
The LeadingME® Ladder of Leadership
LeadingME® emerged from the journey to understand ME — what makes us tick, how our ego affects us, and how it influences our behavior.
The LeadingME® Ladder of Leadership shows how the extremes of ego, either “bigging it up” or “belittling”, pull us away from our centre. But true balance lies in the middle, where nurturing, self-awareness, and responsibility meet.
The key to overcoming this is recognising when our ego is controlling us—through thoughts like “I have to do this” or “I should do that.” Alternatively, falling into a “poor me” mindset, blaming others or feeling victimised.
The Power of Taking a Break and Setting Boundaries
When it comes to managing overwhelm, take a break and set boundaries because it’s bloody important. And the first person you need to set boundaries with is yourself.
We often take on too much, trying to prove something to ourselves but it all starts with living by our values. We have to sit with ourselves and really ask, “What am I doing to myself? What’s the cause of this? “
If you can’t figure it out alone, talk to someone — a mentor, a coach, a trusted friend, someone who can step outside of your “movie” and see things clearly. But whatever you do, stop blaming others. Own your overwhelm, pause, and refocus before burnout takes over.
Own Your Overwhelm by Being in the Present
It doesn’t just mean stopping for a moment to catch your breath. It means prioritising meditation, walking in nature, exercise, reading, yoga — whatever works for you.
Eckhart Tolle says, “When you are overwhelmed by the future… and the past, you have lost the present.” Overwhelm happens when we stop being in the now.
So, stop and listen. Smell the roses, go for a walk in nature.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s time to really pause and ask yourself: Where’s it coming from? Is it physical? Emotional? Mental? Maybe it’s all three, but if you’ve hit burnout. Take action.
We all have been there. I used to think I was invincible, too. And I’m not. And neither are you.
Stay True, Stay You
And Keep Bringing Out Your Brilliance!
